Taking the (Cats) Biscuit

UKIP Parliamentary candidate Kerry Smith has had to resign after being homophobic and racist, which is a bit like being thrown out of the rock band Hawkwind for taking too many drugs, which actually happened to bass player Lemmy Kilmister.

The disgraced councillor said he was on strong morphine-based prescription medication; I know what it must be like to be on those drugs having been to the musical Cat’s this weekend with my daughter and her cousins; the West End production was less interesting then being kept on hold whist waiting to speak to a customer service representative from British Airways, which also takes the biscuit.

If you’d like to bake the biscuit, try this feline shaped ginger cookie by sifting together the flour, baking soda, cinnamon cloves, nutmeg, ginger and salt. In a separate operation and using an electric mixer, combine the brown sugar, oil and molasses; after 5 minutes add the egg, and then start adding the dry ingredients, followed by the crystallised ginger. Flour a pin and roll out the dough to form a flat base and using a cat shaped cutter, lay the kitten cutouts onto a heat-resistant baking mat and bake on 160oC for 13 minutes or until cooked. Transfer to a wire rack and allow to cool completely before using the icing mixture to pipe on faces and whiskers.

Neil Hamilton pulled out of contention for the seat amid questions raised by UKIP over expenses while another candidate, Natasha Bolter withdrew amid sexual harassment claims. The Basildon constituency is a cat that appears to have claws; one must wonder how may UKIP lives it has left.

Ginger Kitten Cookies

Makes about 10

280g cups flour
1-teaspoon baking soda
2 teaspoons ground cinnamon
11/2 teaspoons ground cloves
1/2-teaspoon ground nutmeg
1/2-teaspoon ground ginger
1/4-teaspoon salt
200g dark brown sugar
1/4 vegetable Oil
1/3 cup unsulfured molasses
1 large egg
170g crystallised ginger

For the decorative Icing:

1x200g icing sugar
1/2-teaspoon vanilla extract
2-2.5 tablespoons milk/water